So what am I supposed to write in this article? I’m not sure yet. I’ve just finished my shower and my mood now is much better. What should I give as the title for this article? I was thinking and then came up with an idea: How to raise a kid? It sounds a bit weird as I’ve been thinking about it now and then but it’s never been an obvious sturdy thought in my mind. It just comes sometimes when I think about what my future life in the next 10 or 20 years would be. Yea, I will definitely have kids of my own, with the man I love but not right now. Occasionally, I consider myself a person who was born to be a mother as I specially love children, in a unique way. I could hold a baby in my arms for ages, feed him or look after him when he lies sleeping. Whenever I hold a baby, my maternal instinct emerges powerfully and at that time, I promise to myself I would be a good mother as much as I can. I know it’s not an easy task to do. Raising a kid is not just about feeding him or changing his nappies. It’s also about providing him with love, so much love and teaching him how to be a good person. The parenting process is much more difficult and challenging than feeding the kids and not everybody is successful at it. Many people fail in showing their kids the way to be good citizens even though they try a lot, in many ways. I’m not just saying or giving a moral lesson. I’m not qualified enough to be a mother at the moment and I’m not ready as well. I’m just sharing my own opinions on this matter as I hope I could draw some precious experiences after this and apply on my own parenting techniques for my children in the future 🙂 It’s good for a mother to be prepared though!
Everyone, even the toughest person wants to have good kids of their own. I’m not referring to the ones who don’t want kids. I’m talking about normal people who used to or are on the way or will be parents. They all want the best things for their kids and most of the time; they even love their kids more than themselves. It’s one of the most amazing things in the world as a person, who is often supposed to be selfish and cares for himself only, loves someone more than himself. I don’t know about other parents but to me, I’ll absolutely love my children unconditionally and I’m willing to give my best for them. I’m not mature enough to think about exactly how many children I will have or the best way to raise them. I just know that it’s a natural thing for me to love my kids and I’ll do it without any awareness. It’s called instinct.
However, I’m thinking of some “rules” when having and raising my kids. I call them “rules” because they are some vital factors which may influence my kid’s upbringing in the future. I’m not a strict rigid person who always set up severe disciplines and forces others to obey. I just want to put things in order to take control of them all. At least I don’t want to make a mess, especially with such an important thing like this.
1. I’ll have kids with the man I love. =>;; My kids will be created by love, not silly accidents. Or they may be made by accidents but accidents with love: P
Everyone knows the way to make a baby but I’m not talking about purely sexual problem. I mean yea, of course we need to have sex to make babies but I definitely have my own babies by making love with my man. We are human then we need to follow some natural processes. But we are different to animals because we know love and we show our love to each other in many ways, one of them is making love. It’s a sacred thing. Making love is an art and we need to love our partners passionately to feel all the beauties that love brings. And then, a baby will be created as the result of love. It’s a good way to have babies, not just having sex for fun, not just having babies to carry out some dirty purposes. I want my babies happy and proud when they know that they were made by love, not any other thing J and it’s great when you could have the baby with your man, someone you love, admire and want to spend your whole life with. The babies will be the best part of your life!
2. I’ll show my babies every day; in many ways how much I love them.
All parents want their kids healthy, smart and so do I. I want the best for my babies. Nothing is perfect but I’ll try as much as I can to bring them a good life. However, I’ll not only provide them with material needs but also with emotional care. I’ll kiss my children whenever I can to show them how much I love them then I try to learn how to cook good meals for them, prepare everything they need for their camping with classmates or simply, read bedtime stories for them every night. I’ll try to be a good mother like my mother was before. She’s an excellent one indeed. There’s no mother in the world could ever compare to her as she’s so good to be a mother. I’m the lucky one to have a mom like her J I’ll pick up my kids after school, drive them around or take them home and cook something for them before they take a short nap. Then every week the whole family will take a trip somewhere to enjoy the weekend and strengthens the relationships among family members. I want my kids have as many good childhood memories as possible and they will never able to forget even when they already grow up. I’ll be a beautiful gentle loving mom who always listens, understands and is willing to help my kids out of troubles. I don’t want to be just their mom. I also want to be their friends. It’s a hard thing to do as we’re in 2 generations with lots of differences but I’ll try to enter their world and understand because I believe that whenever they are or whatever they do, they are basically human and I know they are nature good.
3. I’ll try to give them a happy family.
It depends on many factors to make a happy family but I’ll try my best to give my kids a happy one which is always filled with laughs and joy. Before having babies, when my husband and I are really ready to be parents, I need to have a straight clear discussion with him on building a happy nest for my little kids. It’s very important for them to live in a happy family as they can develop properly without any disadvantages. Children are very sensitive and adults sometimes forget that children know everything, even the things adults try to hide from them. They may not know the specific problems but they can feel something going wrong between their mom and dad. It makes them insecure and scared. The thing kids fear the most is not being loved anymore, not like not being provided with nice clothes or new toys. They need love more than any other thing because they are little, vulnerable and need to be cuddled, held and protected from harms by their parents. I couldn’t stand seeing my kids bursting into tears of the feeling being abandoned or left behind by us. I’ll feel guilty if I couldn’t give them a happy family with mom and dad loving them like other kids has. Then I promise to myself, no matter what happen, I’ll try to give them the happiest family, the place they can return whenever they are happy or upset; the place where they can find love and trust; the place called home where there’re always mom and dad waiting for them. Then I need to look for a good man first as he’ll be the right man who I can love, trust and depend on 🙂 I believe I’ll find him, sooner or later!
4. I’ll teach my kids how to love and many other things.
I never hope my kids the smartest ones in their classes or outstanding among their classmates but I hope them understand, feel lucky with what they have then help people who are not as lucky as they are. I hope they know what love is and how to love people. I may be rich and my children may be borne without any material shortage but they also need to respect what they have, not just taken those things for granted. It’s so dangerous when a child is born in a rich family and he becomes conceited and arrogant. They need to sympathy with people who are poor, disabled or the ones who are suffered from famines, diseases, etc all over the world. They need to feel lucky and positive. They need to know how hard it is to make the money and money is not from trees then they’ll know how to spend them properly without illusion of their parent’s endless treasure.
I also wish my kids had knowledge and are always eager for learning as I did when I was little. I want them to read books to gain more and more knowledge. I want them to feel how big the world is and also have passion to explore it. I want them to be wise well-educated children who know how to behave themselves. I want them to go and to do things that I haven’t finished or done in my life. I want them to have great lives without limits and regrets. I want them to live the life they want. I want all best thing for them <;;3
There’re so many other “rules” I wanna set up to apply in my parenting in the future but I may write them down in another article. The most important thing is I’ll love them with all my heart, with the whole me then they’ll know they’re the lucky ones as they have a good mother who always care about them and ready to scarify for them no matter what.
I don’t know how long it takes me to be ready to be a good mother and I’m willing to wait. But I’ll try to be a good mother as much as I can. The only reason is I love my kids. They’re a part of me. I’m a part of them.
Sleep well my little sweeties! Mommy loves you all!